


Like this, love this

by Bogsung_a



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Actor Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun, First Kisses, Fluff, Jealous Lee Taeyong, Jealousy, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-26
Updated: 2020-02-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:34:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22900300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bogsung_a/pseuds/Bogsung_a
Summary: Jaehyun gets to be the lead in a drama, there’s a kiss scene.Taeyong hates it.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Lee Taeyong
Comments: 29
Kudos: 324





	Like this, love this

**Author's Note:**

> Title is taken from the song: Love song by NCT127.
> 
> Update: Fixed typos

The grin that hangs from Taeyong's lips at the moment is by far, the smile he wishes to show the man in front of him.

From his lap, Jaehyun, who was turned around watching television, is shifting again so he can accommodate himself better and he can be able to see his face from his new position. Taeyong blinks several times when Jaehyun's eyes fill with stars and he repeats again.

"A romantic drama, Hyung!" He says excitedly, dimples showing on his soft cheeks, Taeyong’s hand stops abruptly from caressing the younger brown locks. “And I'll be the main lead!”

Taeyong tries again to give him a smile, but the stiffness of his cheeks indicates that what he’s offering the younger is more of a grimace. He is really happy for Jaehyun, the man has wanted to prove himself as an actor since they debuted, going to courses, reading books on the subject practicing diligently day and night. Jaehyun always gets what he wants when he puts all his efforts into it. Learning several phrases in different languages to communicate with fans? Done, learning bowling in less than 1 month and winning a medal? done! (even set a record), learning box? Done, done and done. This news shouldn't come as a surprise to Taeyong. It was something that was coming.

Jaehyun's smile is not extinguished even when Taeyong's vanishes from his face.

What was a surprise to Taeyong was that Jaehyun was the lead. Not that he will doubt the younger’s talent, at all. But if Jaehyun was the lead in a drama, romantic nonetheless, that also meant there was a...

"A kissing scene, yes." Jaehyun murmured shyly the next day during breakfast when he shared the news to the rest of the group. His ears turning scarlet when Yuta wolf whistles loudly. "I'm a little nervous about how fans are going to react..."

“Wah! Hyung! Be careful,”Donghyuck yelled behind mouthfuls of pancakes, Dongyoung stares at him in disgust as he tries to put his hand in front of Hyuck's mouth, he ignores him. "Noona will totally fall for you once she tastes those sweet as honey lips of yours.”

Johnny lets out a loud laugh that Taeyong swears has all their dorm’s windows shaking.

"I don't think that’ll be a problem Hyuck." Johnny says with a laugh. Jaehyun hisses at him behind his cup of coffee.

“Anyway,” interjects Taeil loudly when he sees that Jaehyun’s about to clap back at Johnny (and let’s be honest, it’s going to be something full of profanities) “We are all so glad for you Jaehyunie, we’ll be cheering for you.” Taeil turns to give Taeyong a pointed look, who didn’t join the rest of the members to cook for Jaehyun’s. _“Congrats on getting employed, I guess”_ breakfast. 

He felt bad. Jaehyun deserved better than the rushed “Congrats Jaehyunie.” followed by a tight smile that he gave the younger yesterday night, where they were enjoying their weekly movie 'date/hang-out', he felt even worse, when Jaehyun had whined and whined until Taeyong continued to pet his hair while he continues to talk more about the drama he was in. But he couldn’t find it in himself to not feel like shit. Because instead of feeling happy for Jaehyun and this big opportunity, all they could think about was the horrible thought of the inimitable, someone who was no Taeyong was going to get to kiss Jung Jaehyun. 

And it was fucking petty. 

He knew that what he was feeling was pretty unreasonable, he knew he didn’t have any right to feel this way, after all, Jaehyun and Taeyong were just friends, even if, over the years their work relationship had developed to a comradeship to a deep friendship to something that most of the time, tip-toed the lines of _something else._ Something that was all hushed compliments and encouragement, shy touches and longing stares behind closed doors and sometimes even on camera. 

He was really mad at himself for feeling that way, and he didn’t want Jaehyun to think he was mad at him for getting a job that he had worked so hard for. No, he wasn’t mad about that, he was mad at _the job,_ one where he had to kiss a pretty woman in front of a camera, for as many takes as the director wanted, for all the world to see. 

Jaehyun didn’t deserve this, he deserved to be congratulated and supported by his loved ones for this achievement. And behind all of his petty jealousy at those lips that were going to get to feel Jaehyun’s soft ones, he felt proud of him too. 

Jealous or not, he should say something, he’s the group’s leader after all. 

“We are really proud Jaehyunie, you deserve it.” Taeyong finds himself smiling softly because, despite everything he means it. “Let us know if you need anything, we’ll gladly help you.” 

They all nod happily and murmur in agreement, Mark's the most enthusiastic of all, happily exclaiming a few _'Wows'_ and in a mix of English and Korean, “You’re going to nail this.”

Jaehyun smile is so big and grateful that Taeyong’s pettiness evaporates, “Thank you Hyung.” 

“If you need any practice for the kiss let us know.” Hollers Donghyuck winking shamelessly at Jaehyun before resting his chin on the younger’s shoulder. 

“Yeah, I’m sure we’ll think of something,” adds Yuta following Donghyuck’s wink with one of his own “Just trust us.” 

“I’ll rather choke to death before kissing any of you.” Spats Jaehyun pushing Hyuck away when the younger begins to blow air into his neck. 

Johnny hums looking at Jaehyun and then dragging his eyes to Taeyong, with an evil glint on his eyes that has Jaehyun shifting uncomfortably on his seat. “Are you sure about that?” 

Jaehyun's face turns a new shade of red before leaving the table while Yuta and Donghyuck crackle like crazy. 

* * *

Filming begins in November, a few days later after finishing their American tour. They are all tired, sleeping at odd hours thanks to the jet-lag and instead of enjoying their few rest days SM gives them, Jaehyun is summoned to start shooting two weeks before scheduled. 

While the rest of the members spend their break wandering aimlessly around the dorm like loafers, creating PUBG challenges among themselves where the prize for the winner was to avoid doing their chores, poor Jaehyun has to wake up at 5:00 AM returning home at 1:00 AM. 

Taeyong feels a weight in his stomach when he sees the younger dragging his feet, bags under his beautiful brown eyes smiling faintly to the rest of them before falling dead in his room and repeating it all the next day.

Their little hangouts come to an end too, and since Jaehyun’s never been a fan of text messaging Taeyong has to do with the stolen glances he sometimes catches himself giving Jaehyun before the younger disappears in his room to sleep or the tired smiles Jaehyun gives him when he catches Taeyong looking at him too intently from across their breakfast table on those rare days where Jaehyun's schedule begins in the afternoon. 

Everyone keeps their promise to help Jaehyun with whatever he needs, some are in thoughtful things: like Taeil and Jungwoo initiating a little campaign where they make sure everyone showers under 10 minutes so they can all save enough hot water for Jaehyun when he needs to shower or Dongyoung and Yuta who take the chore to make his laundry, Johnny, who puts 3 alarm clocks so he can wake up at the same time as Jaehyun just so he can make him coffee and hype him up before dragging his ass back to sleep.

Others, like Mark and Donghyuck, are a little more... _special_. The youngest found a way to read all of Jaehyun’s scripts, memorizing all the dialog and shout it out loud at random times during Jaehyun’s very rare time’s off so he’s: “Always prepared Hyung, you never know.” 

But Taeyong finds his own way to at least let him know he is there, even if he still feels the horrible jealousy buried deep in him, even if he shuts down the younger every time he’s about to talk about how amazing and sweet and helpful Sooyoung noona is. Even if Taeyong’s been snappier and moodier with Jaehyun without any reasonable reason. 

Taeyong had taken upon himself to bring Jaehyun all sorts of medicines and vitamins to keep the younger as healthy as he can with that fucked up schedule he has right now. Most of the time, he sneaks to his room when he’s sure Jaehyun’s deep asleep and puts his vitamins beside a tall glass of water and pats Jaehyun’s dark hair before leaving. He feels it’s his own way of apologizing for the horrible _friend_ he's been with Jaehyun in the past days. 

Today though, he finds Jaehyun up, droopy eyes looking at the door where Taeyong is frozen, a convenience store bag on his hands full of hot patches, ones he had run to get when he heard Jaehyun talking to Johnny about shoulder pain. Taeyong’s eyes look at Jungwoo’s empty bed and then back at Jaehyun who’s eyeing the plastic bag with poorly concealed amusement. 

“Is that for me Hyung?” 

Taeyong nods dumbly as Jaehyun motions for him to come inside. Despite the clear exhaustion that’s shadowing the younger’s face the smile he gives Taeyong when he sees the older closing the door behind him it’s so, so beautiful it just reminds him how much he feels for this young and talented and passionate man in front of him. 

“Are you going to stay this time?” Jaehyun chides, eyes crinkling under the dim light of his bedside lamp. “Or are you going to disappear on me like all the other nights?” 

Taeyong doesn’t have the heart -or guts- to deny it, “You knew it was me?”

Jaehyun huffs and turns around so Taeyong is staring at his back. “After all these years, you don’t think I’ll be able to know how your touch feels?” 

He feels his face turning hot, he laughs abashed not knowing what to say. He should have known, Jaehyun’s a clever man and Taeyong is not the best at hiding things, especially when they are about him. 

Looks like Jaehyun wasn’t waiting for an answer from Taeyong because he points to the bag with his head and says without turning, “Help me put them on, please?” 

He nods but stops when he remembers that Jaehyun can’t see him, he begins to take out the contents of his _'peace offering'_ plastic bag clumsily with shaky hands thanking all of the heavens that Jaehyun is not looking at him right now so he can’t see the mess that he created just with that admission. 

“Hyung,” Jaehyun grunts, voice low and heavy with sleep. Taeyong hums quietly while opening one of the patches so he can put them on before bed, “I’ve missed you.”

 _I miss you too,_ Taeyong thinks, _I miss you a lot_. He’s just too much of a coward to try and let Jaehyun know. To let him know how much he misses him, how much he needs him, how much he needs the younger to reassure him that he’s just busy, they are not fighting, they are not drifting apart. That he forgives Taeyong for being so childish with all of this, for making it bigger than it is. 

He gulps filled with guilt and because he's a coward.

“We missed you too.” he manages to say. 

Jaehyun let out another huff, this one a little more exasperated than before, he finally mutters, sounding so tired that Taeyong feels his heartache a little.“Then give everyone my thanks.” 

“Why?” 

“What?” Jaehyun murmurs sleepily, moving the collar of his sweatshirt so Taeyong can help him put the patches against his tired skin. 

Taeyong shakes his head, angry at himself again when he feels the need to kiss the tired skin of his shoulder. Once he’s sure the patch won’t crease he presses it against Jaehyun’s pale skin causing him to moan in relaxation. 

He tries to ignore how that grumble makes its way into a place behind his ribcage. The younger shrugs while fixing his collar once both his shoulders are attended, and he turns to smile sleepily to him, there’s no traces of his annoyance with Taeyong. 

It helps him relax just a little. 

Jaehyun moves so he can lie down on his bed under the covers, with a smile still adorning his lips he pats the vacant space so Taeyong can lie down next to him. It’s not the first time they’ve done this, so Taeyong feels his body move by itself, quickly finding the most comfortable position, relaxing in each other's arms. 

“Why don’t you say it yourself?” asks Taeyong, face buried on top of Jaehyun’s mop of dark hair, while Jaehyun rests one of his hands near Taeyong’s chest. He breathes deep the noble and sweet smell of Jaehyun, he lets his scent could his senses and savors the feeling of having the younger in his arms after weeks of not being able to hold him like this, where they are so close that Jaehyun’s heartbeat is his own, so close that the younger’s hand upon his chest, it’s Taeyong’s.

After some time where both of them are basking in the silence and comfort of their favorite place to be, Jaehyun whispers against his heart: “Because Hyung knows my heart very well,” he shifts lips brushing against Taeyong’s chest, “You’ll find a way to let them know how I feel.”

Taeyong closes his eyes when he feels the faintest ghost of a kiss on his adam’s apple.

Before he drifts to sleep, something in the back of his mind tells him that the younger’s was probably not just talking about thanking their members. 

* * *

Taeyong’s not very sure when it happened when the fond and careless touches he shared with Jaehyun became something he yearned, cherished secretly. When, the thing that kept him up all night wasn’t his need to perfect a song, but the itch of want that burned inside of him when he thought of shining dark eyes. 

He loved him, as one loves certain obscure things, secretly, between the shadows and the soul. He knows he’s in love with him, but he doesn’t know how, or when, or from where. 

He knows he loves him when his insides burn and his body turns numb in jealousy as he watches from his space from the sofa, between an overly excited Yuta and Donghyuck, how Jaehyun leans to kiss the thin lips of a beautiful woman, one that has her slender fingers clutching at the lapels of his suit. One who’s delicate face is framed by Jaehyun’s hands, cupping her cheeks with such tenderness. 

It’s. too. fucking. much.

He knows he loves him when Taeyong feels like a comet crashing down earth, flames consuming him and finally turning him into dust. He feels anger burning deep in his stomach and he can no longer pretend he’s enjoying it like everybody else. Without a word, he makes his way to his bedroom and shuts the door with so hard he feels how his windows shake by force. 

* * *

Taeyong doesn’t know how long he has been staring blankly at the ceiling just replaying and replaying the kissing scene. He looked at his phone in his nightstand Jaehyun had stopped trying to call him by 2:00 AM, his knocks on the door had stopped much earlier. He sighed angrily at himself for being such a child. 

So what if Jaehyun had...It was his job, Taeyong can’t be mad about a job. He didn’t have the right to be jealous of a job. They weren’t anything. He never found the best way to say something to the younger, it was never the right _time_. Taeyong was with Super M, then he was trying to settle for their new album, then Jaehyun had his gig for Inkigayo, then their tour, then the drama...But he also didn’t have the courage to ask for something else from Jaehyun, the younger looked too happy with whatever _t_ _his_ was and in the rare nights were Taeyong had let the hope grow inside his chest from how gently and loving Jaehyun's touches were, something happened that crushed that hope mercilessly. 

Sighing, he decides it's time to do something, anything other than feeling sorry for himself so he slowly climbs out of his bed and makes his way outside. 

He doesn’t manage to go far. Jung Jaehyun is sitting outside opposite of his door tired eyes staring at Taeyong with such intensity it makes him coward back inside. He’s about to close the door when Jaehyun pushes the door and closes it behind him. 

“Silly Hyung.” sighs Jaehyun taking one of Taeyong's hands on his slowly closing the distance between them. Taeyong huffs indignantly. The last thing he needs right now is Jaehyun’s poking fun at him. 

He murmurs something to himself before engulfing him in a tight hug, Taeyong frowns confused, hands automatically making their way to Jaehyun’s lower back. He feels like he’s missing something when Jaehyun laughs pressing his lips to the crown on his head. 

“Why are you mad about a stupid kiss? From my job nonetheless!, I thought you knew about my heart the best.” He whispers amused, “Why are you jealous about something so...inconsequential when you have my whole heart.” Jaehyun pries himself from their hug before he looks at Taeyong again with the same intensity as before. “Isn’t that enough?”

Taeyong looks at Jaehyun, brain too slow to process what the younger’s saying. He knows it’s something important by the way that even if Jaehyun’s not hugging him, his hands are resting on Taeyong’s waist. How he feels he’s going to drown Jaehyun's eyes, that are looking at him in pure adoration. How he remembers feeling the rapid beating of the younger’s heart when he was hugging him. 

_Oh._

“Wait…”

He feels a finger pressing against his mouth, Jaehyun continues totally immersed in playing with Taeyong’s lower lip.

“I love you Taeyong, I love you, I love you, I love you, I’m so in love with you it’s actually kind of embarrassing.” Taeyong laughs dumbfounded, lips scratching in a big smile, Jaehyun follows the movement with his eyes before he looks up again. “How could I not Taeyong? I love you, even if you sometimes forget how great you are, how happy you make me, how much I need you.”

Taeyong feels his soul soar, feels his heart grows so much he thinks it’s not possible his chest can contain it. He presses a quiet kiss against Jaehyun’s finger, pleased at the way the younger’s ears turn red by the sweet gesture. 

“I love you too.” 

“I always thought you were better at words, you know, being a songwriter and all but…” Jaehyun tsks.

The weight of years and years of loving the younger in the shadows surge with full force as he sees the same love he feels for Jaehyun reflected in the younger's eyes. 

“I love you, I love you with every fiber of my soul, with every breath of my body, with every heartbeat, I love you when you’re here or gone, I love you when you’re quiet, I love you when you’re loud, and I’m scared I’ll never be able to put into words how much I love you because this,” Taeyong guides on of Jaehyun’s hands to his chest, above his heart, he moves so their faces are close, so he can feel the younger’s breath ghosting against his mouth, “It’s so much bigger than me.” 

The younger makes a choked sound before Taeyong continues voice lower than before, “I craved you like this for so long, your mouth, your lips calling for me like this, just like this.” He breathes against Jaehyun’s lips before kissing him, deep, desperate, demanding, pouring all of him into every lick, every nimble against Jaehyun’s pliant mouth.

He feels himself smile against the kiss when Jaehyun tugs his lower lip hard with his teeth, hands roaming from his hips before they settle in his neck where his thumbs can make circular motions against his cheeks. 

Jaehyun kisses his smile, pressing sweet pecks until Taeyong's a whining mess demanding to be properly kissed. They kiss and kiss again until both are out of breath and Jaehyun's laughing low chuckles leaving his swollen lips and Taeyong wants to shallow every single sound that leaves that pretty mouth. 

“I’m sorry for being so shitty these past weeks,” he manages to mumble against Jaehyun's mouth. “I'm…” 

The low voice of Jaehyun sounds like a warning when he musters his name mid-kiss. 

"Baby," he feels the tip of Jaehyun's tongue trace along the corner of his mouth, he hums in answer. "This was definitely better, a fuck." Taeyong circles the younger's middle with his legs as Jaehyun takes them to his bed. "God you're so hot." He manages to whine before Jaehyun puts him down gently on the mattress and hovers above him. A shiver travels down his spine when Jaehyun's lips drag themselves across the expanse of his neck. "This...this was better than the one with your Sooyoung noona, right?" 

He yelps when Jaehyun bits down his neck, that doesn't stop him from asking again. Taeyong's levels of pettiness know no limits. " _Right?"_

“If you don’t shut up _love,_ ” Jaehyun grumbles angry nipping hard at his adam's apple. “I _swear_ to God.”

“I’m sorry _dear,_ ” Taeyong smiles cheeky, bringing his hands above Jaehyun’s own on his hair and kisses the younger’s burning cheeks. “I’ll shut up now.”

**Author's Note:**

> This word vomit was inspired by: "Love Sonnet XI" and "One Hundred Love Sonnets: XVII" By Pablo Neruda, if you detect some similarities/quotes, it's from there. 
> 
> Like every other thing I write, this is totally self-indulgent.
> 
> All your comments and kudos are appreciated.


End file.
